In the 34th episode of The One Percent Show, I talked with Leander Paes, the Indian tennis legend widely regarded as one of the greatest doubles players in tennis history. We explored Leander’s remarkable journey over four decades to become a tennis legend, his philosophy on hard work, patience, and dealing with losses and failures, and his advice to the young generation on playing the long game, in tennis and life.
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At one instance during our conversation, Leander said something really beautiful –
It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to feel lonely. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to feel that you are disappointed in yourself or in someone else. It’s okay. But what’s important is the quick recovery time. You can’t dwell on that. Cry your tears, feel disappointed, feel your highs and your lows, and move on quick.
That recovery time between the actual act of losing and the actual act of winning, and moving to what the next task is, the shorter that period, the more successful you will be.
This is such powerful advice from Leander – that of a “quick recovery time.” It’s like emotional elasticity, the ability to stretch with life’s challenges and then snap back into shape.
Also, he does not advise us to suppress our feelings but to experience them fully and then move forward with intention.
Leander echoed Charlie Munger’s philosophy, who once said –
Generally speaking, envy, resentment, revenge, and self-pity are disastrous modes of thought…Life will have terrible blows, horrible blows, unfair blows, it doesn’t matter. Some people recover and others don’t. There I think the attitude of Epictetus is the best. He thought that every mischance in life was an opportunity to behave well. Every mischance in life was an opportunity to learn something and that your duty was not to be immersed in self-pity, but to utilize the terrible blow in a constructive fashion. That is a very good idea.
Think about it for a moment – how often do we get stuck in a loop of negative emotions, replaying disappointments or failures? Leander suggests a different approach. Feel it, embrace it, then let it go.
Now, this is not as easy as it sounds because it requires practice, patience, and self-compassion. But if we can master this balance between honouring our emotions and working on our resilience to be able to bounce back from our setbacks with renewed focus, we can move through life with grace and strength.
As the American professor and mindfulness teacher John Kabat-Zinn said –
You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.
The next time you are hit by a wave of emotion, remember Leander’s and Charlie’s advice – do not avoid the wave, but surf it. You will be fine.
The Sketchbook of Wisdom: A Hand-Crafted Manual on the Pursuit of Wealth and Good Life.
This is a masterpiece.
– Morgan Housel, Author, The Psychology of Money
What I’m Reading
Lessons From a Philosopher President
The New York Times carries an interview with José Mujica, the former President of Uruguay (2010-2015). In the interview, Mujica shared a few incredible lessons on life and living, including this –
You’re free when you escape the law of necessity — when you spend the time of your life on what you desire. If your needs multiply, you spend your life covering those needs.
Humans can create infinite needs. The market dominates us, and it robs us of our lives.
Humanity needs to work less, have more free time and be more grounded. Why so much garbage? Why do you have to change your car? Change the refrigerator?
There is only one life and it ends. You have to give meaning to it. Fight for happiness, not just for wealth.
And this –
…life is beautiful. With all its ups and downs, I love life. And I’m losing it because it’s my time to leave. What meaning can we give to life? Man, compared to other animals, has the ability to find a purpose.
Or not. If you don’t find it, the market will have you paying bills the rest of your life.
If you find it, you will have something to live for. Those who investigate, those who play music, those who love sports, anything. Something that fills your life.
I have never heard of Mujica, but now I long to explore him.
Notes to Myself
What does success really mean to me? I should think about this. Maybe it is different from what I have been chasing. Worth exploring. It could be about personal growth, relationships, or making a difference. I need to define it for myself, not let others or society dictate it. That might change how I spend my time and energy.
***
Next time something feels hard or uncomfortable, I will try not to avoid it. It could be a chance to grow. I might surprise myself. Discomfort often signals that I am pushing my boundaries. But that is where real progress happens. Even if I fail, I will learn something valuable. And the future me may thank the present me for that.
***
I need to focus more on my relationships. Spend real time with people, and have meaningful talks. Those moments stick with me more than stuff I buy. Quality over quantity always wins in friendships. I need to be there for others, and let them be there for me. I need to share my fears, dreams, and laughter. These connections give life richness and support during tough times. I need to invest in them like I would in any other important part of life.
Book Recommendation
Like all of his books, I love Ruskin Bond’s A Book of Simple Living for the essence it captures of quiet moments, the charm of nature, and the joy found in the mundane.
What inspires me most about this book is its ability to distil wisdom from everyday experiences, with a call to slow down and appreciate the little things that often go unnoticed.
Bond’s writing reflects a deep connection with nature and a life lived in harmony with it. His observations are simple yet deep, and offer solace and a sense of peace in the chaos of the world.
One of the passages that resonates deeply with me is –
I think Tolstoy summed it all up when he said: “One ought only to write when one leaves a piece of one’s flesh in the ink-pot each time one dips one’s pen.”
To which I might humbly add: There is something to be said for ink-pots. And the hand that holds the pen. It must be far more difficult to share one’s body and soul with a typewriter or computer. I abandoned the typewriter long ago. There is something sensual, physical, intimate about writing by hand. It takes me back to my childhood, when I was first learning to write letters and join them together. When I had any difficulty, my father would put his hand on mine and guide it along the page.
His hand is still there. I feel it now, even as I write.
And may loving, long-gone hands touch yours, dear reader.
We are not alone.
If you have not read it yet, give A Book of Simple Living a try.
Quotes I’m Reflecting On
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.
– Ralph Waldo Emerson
***
To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.
– Oscar Wilde
***
The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
– Nelson Mandela
That’s all from me for today.
Let me know your thoughts on this issue of The Almanack of Good Life newsletter, and ways I can improve it. Also, if you have ideas or resources you think I can share in future letters, please email them to me at vishal[at]safalniveshak[dot]com.
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~ Vishal
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